Whether abuse occurs during or after an intimate relationship ends, it is never the victim's fault. Abuse is always the responsibility of the one who is perpetrating it.
Quote Source: Triumph Over Abuse book, p. 130.
In Chapter 4 of Triumph Over Abuse, I write in detail about the potential value of educating yourself about abuse as part of the recovery process. In our See the Triumph research, we've heard from many survivors how important gaining new knowledge and understanding about the dynamics of abuse was to understanding their past experiences.
There are many useful tools available for learning about abusive relationships, including books, websites, online and in-person workshops, and talking with other survivors and professionals. If you're on the journey of healing from past abuse, take time to map out a plan that will work for you.
One resource that may offer a good starting point is the Collections section of our See the Triumph website, which has resources and blog posts organized by different topics.
Check out our newest See the Triumph #SurvivorsTriumphing video! This time, we're featuring Quasona Oliver, who is sure to inspire you with her insights on how advocacy work was so key to her healing journey.
Would you like to be featured in an upcoming #SurvivorsTriumphing video? If so, please send me a message through the Contact Us page to connect!
Along the journey of recovering from past abuse, it is important to make your peace a priority. Make choices to practice self-care, honor your boundaries in relationships with others, and honor the big and small steps you take toward healing.
One of my favorite chapters to write in Triumph Over Abuse was Chapter 5, Taking Back Control of your Mind. The mind control tactics that many abusers use to gain and maintain power of their partners are one of the lesser known aspects of abusive relationships. And yet, this aspect abuse can have a powerful influence on survivors' recovery processes.
Learning to identify potentially negative thought patterns, correct faulty belief systems that hinder your progress, and build new, growth-promoting belief systems all can be critical parts of healing from past abuse.
For many survivors, taking back control of their minds is a significant step toward healing. This is a process, however, and not just a one-time event. Building more positive, empowering thinking patterns and underlying belief systems takes time, but being intentional in this area can be extremely valuable in the overall healing journey.
Today, my guest blog post, "A complicated to-do list: Recovering from trauma and managing life as a busy parent," is featured in the Triad Moms on Main blog. In the post, I share some thoughts on how to manage the daily demands of parenting, while also working through the process of healing and recovering from trauma. Triad Moms on Main is a wonderful parenting resource for families in the Piedmont Triad region of North Carolina, and I was grateful for the opportunity to share this information with them!
Over the years, our See the Triumph team has created a number of free resources that we make available to survivors and professionals who work with survivors. All of these resources can be requested through forms on the See the Triumph website.
You can learn more about each resource and find out how to request them at the following links:
All of these resources are based on our See the Triumph research and are designed to offer practical tools to support survivors in their journey of recovering from past abuse.
Note: This post is cross-posted from this See the Triumph blog post.
I was so grateful for the wonderful turnout at last week's virtual book launch event for Triumph Over Abuse! If you missed the event or would like to re-listen to the talks from any of the speakers, the videos are now available for viewing on Facebook and YouTube playlists.
I'll also post all of the videos below so you can see them all together!
First, Dr. Allison Crowe shared a bit about the history of our See the Triumph campaign:
Next, we heard from Heather Evans, who is the Editor at Routledge Mental Health, who publised the book:
The next speaker was Catherine Johnson, who is the Director of the Guilford County Family Justice Center, where I'll be donating 20% of my author's royalties from the book:
After that, Dr. Shanita Brown shared tips for how people can support a loved one who is facing the journey of recovering from past abuse:
And finally, I shared some of my own reflections on the book, including insights into how survivors of abuse can overcome common misconceptions about abusive relationships & the recovery process:
Overall, I was so thankful for the opportunity to celebrate the launch of Triumph Over Abuse. Thanks to all who came to the live program, as well as to those who are checking out these videos at a later time!
Here's a sneak peek of the prizes that we'll be doing a drawing for at this Friday's Triumph Over Abuse Virtual Book Launch Event on this Friday, January 15th, from 12-1 p.m. EST:
The four latter prizes aside from the book are inspired by The Coping Toolbox, which I discuss in Chapter 2 of the book. All who attend the live program via Zoom on Friday will be entered in these drawings. There's no cost to attend the event or enter the drawing.
If you haven't already, be sure to register for the event at https://triumphoverabuselaunch.eventbrite.com. I hope to "see" you there!